About Treasured Hearts Healing
Walk alongside and guide women out of the pit of betrayal and despair into the light of Jesus Christ to achieve Truth, Safety and Peace.
My Story
Allison Iverson
Certified Professional Mentor™ CEO, Founder
My life circumstances have not turned out the way I had wanted. I have had so many dreams shattered along my story. Also, MANY things now are better and far more than I could have imagined! New, AMAZING dreams have come to life!! I am ever grateful to the LORD for HIS incredible handiwork of taking tragic things and creating such beauty I thought was never possible!!!
Actually, this is God's story, not mine...
Yep, I am on my 2nd marriage. My first marriage was physically & sexually abusive. I had to leave him because he didn't want to get help. I feared safety for myself and my 2 kids who were a toddler and a baby at the time. He was also struggling with alcohol and drug addiction. And after learning more about sex addiction, I can see he struggled in that area too.
After I left my first marriage I went to counseling and Divorce Care to heal from the divorce, the abuse, & PTSD. I started going to a church where I learned about having a relationship with Christ. This changed me! I was no longer ashamed of my past and was transforming into a wonderful Godly woman! I saw where God was while I was hurting! I had so much healing from working through and processing the abuse. PTSD had become mostly a memory of what I had learned to overcome! I was flourishing in Christ's light and begin leading women to heal from abuse and dysfunction as a spouse/partner/loved one of an addict.
I met a wonderful guy. He was kind, respectful and generous. He showed that he lived a life as a follower of Christ. He was long into recovery for alcohol and gambling addictions. I saw that he clearly knew the importance of being in recovery and was living a recovery lifestyle. He had not wanted porn in our marriage and had great boundaries that showed that to be true. He not only brought Celebrate Recovery into our church and town, he led the whole CR ministry and we both led small groups there. After a few years of friendship, we started dating, then got married. I noticed things were off right away after we got married, but I couldn't figure out what exactly. I went to the church for help, they didn't understand and told me to go to marriage counseling. We did. And 3 counselors later as well as many long waiting list periods in between, we did marriage counseling. By this time, my husband adopted my 2 kids and we had a baby. Then the porn addiction had come out and I was devastated! This broke me! We were getting all the WRONG help but didn't know it! It brought more layers of pain to me and more denial and hiding for him. During all this I had a tragic miscarriage and so much pain on top of pain; trauma on top of trauma. I couldn't grieve the loss of my baby. The gaslighting was really bad and I had previously been taught the "Codependent Model", I was constantly thinking & rethinking what my reactions were and trying to detach yet be a better wife and have more compassion and love, but after years of this, I saw things were actually worse and not better. He kept blaming me and my past for "our" problems (which was actually his addictions, lies, and manipulation causing marriage problems). The gaslighting and thinking I was codependent created me to think I was the problem and I had so much shame and anything I tried only put me in spiraled down into a hot mess. This went on for 4 years. I could see that things were not getting better, yet, I didn't know where else to get the right help! I kept my eyes on God. God was carrying me through; He never dropped me!
I started searching for answers on how to really heal in this situation. I went to a Betrayal & Beyond group online and started going to counseling specific for betrayal trauma with a center that specializes in sex addiction and betrayal trauma, Heart to Heart Counseling Center. I learned that I was not codependent, I was traumatized and had trauma reactions! WOW! The right help was so significant and life changing for me and people around me noticed! I have learned so many tactics of manipulation and deceit that come with addicts and how to respond to them in healthy ways. I learned how to work on and overcome my worthlessness feelings and also how to be mindful of not passing those feelings on to my kids. I learned to be BRAVE even while I was scared!
I learned about Intimacy Anorexia and so many puzzle pieces came together for me about our struggles. My husband's main addictions are Intimacy anorexia and Sex/porn addiction. He also is an alcoholic and gambling addict. I did know about those 2 addictions when we got married and he had been sober for many years at the time and appeared to be living a recovery life. But I didn't know about the hidden addictions. When an addict is sober from one addiction but acting out in another- there is no sobriety or recovery taking place. One of the big things that I learned was to
believe the behavior and not words. Putting this into action, really helped me see reality and then I was able to work through what was in front of me. This was helpful for seeing reality not only in the addict's choices but also in my own steps as well.
Where am I today?
I have been separated from my husband for almost 3 years. He is not making the changes needed for reconciliation. Unfortunately, we are getting a divorce. I do not want this and I know that I have now done the right things and have healthy boundaries. I know I cannot change him. I know that I will be ok and I am definitely on the path God wants for me. I am doing so well! I am still healing and learning and growing; as I believe we all are for a lifetime.
I have so much Peace!! I can enjoy my life!
Credentials
Click on the badges to view more information about my credentials.
The Reason I Become A
Certified Professional Mentor
I have always had a heart for helping people. In particular to see people "getting well". Through much of my life, people have come to me asking advice for different things. I never really thought much of it.
After I healed through the abuse and divorce from my first marriage, I really saw that God had developed something in me to minister to those hurting. I trained to become a leader and started to lead a women's group in Celebrate Recovery. Many of my friends and some women from my groups would comment that I should be a counselor. I took that as compliments but never really seriously thought about doing it. I always enjoyed watching the women in my groups allow God to work inside them and see the change from the inside shine outward!
Fast forward to my healing journey from the betrayal of my second marriage...
When it was only a few months into my betrayal and beyond group; I got a message from my group leader letting me know of the wonderful leadership qualities she saw in me along with compassion and empathy and the ability to be there for others in the group even in the midst of my own tragic pain. She suggested that I become a group leader one day. I was shocked she could see this in me while I was one hot trauma mess!
Then while I was in at an intensive counseling session with Dr. Doug Weiss at Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado; Dr. Weiss was listening to my insight from one of his videos, he shared that he was surprised at how much I had gotten out of it. We talked a bit more and he said, "YOU SHOULD BE A COUNSELOR". The words that I had heard so many times (I don't have enough fingers on my hands to count the times), really sunk in and hit me. I talked to Dr. Weiss about that a bit more and realized that this was a calling from GOD!!
After looking into the options, it was clear that BraveHearts University training to become a Certified Professional Mentor™ was exactly the path God wanted for me and truly matches my heart to help women heal!!
Why the name "Treasured Hearts Healing"?
God Treasures Your Heart
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.
Psalms 34:18
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:7
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Psalm 147:3
I Treasure Your Heart
I understand how fragile and sensitive your heart is after getting violated by betrayal. I have a lot of compassion for your brokenheart.
He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.
2 Corinthians 1:4
God Asks YOU to Treasure your Heart
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23
A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.
Luke 6:45